SCARS REMIND US WHERE WE’VE BEEN

“Scars remind us where we’ve been. But they don’t have to dictate where we’re going”. These were the words of a character in the hit US TV series Criminal Minds (Season 5). They captured my full attention right away so much so that I didn’t have to wait for the episode’s ending credits to appear onscreen. I put on hold watching the next episode to write something about those words. I had to write in an instant, lest words screaming to be put in writing escape me forever.

We all have scars. But some are gone forever. But for a time they were there to remind us how we got them. How much we suffered when we got them. Those brief, fleeting moments when we had those scars could still send shivers down our spine when the memory of the pain, or the pain itself manifesting in some form, comes at any moment when we are vulnerable to anything. You can just imagine how hard it is coping with the reminders that came with those scars.

There are also scars that will be there with us forever. They will always remind us where we’ve been. These are the scars that we must be accustomed to. Scars that we must have to live with, to put it bluntly.

A few days ago, I was wounded. I accidentally kicked a bottle of soda that had been lying around in my living room for quite a while. It stood just below my couch. As I was trying to avoid the shards, I stepped on a big piece of the broken glasses. My foot had two gaping wounds. I was a bleeder. It gave me quite a scare.

Long before I had been wounded, I was already thinking about throwing the soda bottle away. But I was using it as an ashtray. It served a purpose. I am a utilitarian. When a thing may still prove to be useful and I bought it cheap or it was given to me for free, I will not throw it away. But because of that, I spent a few hundred bucks for medicines and tetanus vaccines. So much for trying to be a utilitarian.

I have regrets now. Lots of ‘em, actually. The accidents may, in hindsight, have been avoided. As of this writing, the wound is still fresh. But it’s healing fast. Thanks to a government doctor for prescribing life-saving medication. The doctor said he had a friend before who didn’t take care of his wounds just like mine. His friend has long ago met his Maker.

We may avoid scars if we learn to anticipate what may happen. Let’s face it. Accidents may be avoided, or its damage, minimized. Avoiding clumsiness is one effective deterrent. And getting rid of procrastination is another. But if we can’t avoid accidents, we must learn how to transcend the pain that go with them. And hope that the wounds will heal fast.

But, there’s a very big but, scars don’t have to dictate where we are going. Crazy as it may sound, let’s just be thankful for having those scars because they will help us avoid further disaster that may have been avoided in the first place.

ONE DAY AT A TIME

I am relatively new at blogging. I don’t really know what to get out of it. Maybe it’s just self-fulfillment. You know, it’s that thing where you are able to do something worthwhile in your life, however petty it may be. And then it grows on you.

I don’t expect anyone to read and be interested in what I write about. Although somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind, I have the yearning that someday, my writings will be of interest to a few who may share the same passion I have for writing on any topic just for the heck of it.

I intend to keep writing just to keep my brain working. When your brain is working, properly, that is, you get to live longer and have the chance to offer your services to anyone who may be minded enough to ask you for help or favor.

My mother who is applying for a juicy position in a trial court asked me to compose an application letter for her. I have been sick for quite a while. I really didn’t have the inclination to write anything while I was sick. However, being sick has its rewards. Sort of. When you are sick, you get the rare opportunity to reassess your life in a way that you don’t normally do when you are as healthy as a horse.

Today, I decided to compose my mother’s application letter. It’s long overdue. It’s been two weeks since she last asked me to. I hope and pray that she lands the job. If she doesn’t get the job, oh well, at least she tried aiming for the moon. I will support my mother in any endeavor that she thinks is worth her time. When she gets something out of any endeavor that she lays her eyes on, definitely, our yuletide celebration will be a blast. And she and the rest of the family may celebrate Christmas with me in Manila or in Baguio. Come to think of it, aiming for the moon is not such a bad idea after all. At least you have something to live for.

For now, I will end this article so that I will have sufficient time to do my mother a big favor. A big favor since all her life, she has been working to put food on the table and to see my son through his elementary education.

I owe my mother my life, as any child owes everything to the one who gave him a chance to make a big difference in the world.

I love my mother so much. All my life I have been a pain in the neck. Today, I intend to reform and try to aim for the moon. But I will live one day at a time. No rush.

LOVE IN THE SHADOWS

My family does not know I got back with my long-time girlfriend.

I don’t know how to break the news to my family. Maybe I am just waiting for the right opportunity. My girlfriend — MMCT, initials for now — has been encouraging me to break the news. We fight over it from time to time. Women …

MMCT insists that I do it soon. However, I have yet to wait for her to tell me to talk to her father. Oh well, that’s another story.

Life is stranger than fiction. I heard this a long time ago. Truth is stranger than fiction. That’s another thing. I heard this from the punk band, Bad Religion. Cool band, by the way.

Life really is stranger than fiction. If life is fiction, everything would have been how I wanted it to be. But life isn’t. So I have to roll with the punches, so to speak.